Empower Newsletter – April 2015

Welcome to the April 2015 edition of the Empower Newsletter. In the tradition of April Fools’ Day, this month the focus is on being more playful by saying ‘yes’!

Do you know?

‘is your default response to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’’

Do you say ‘yes’ as your reflex response? ‘Yes’ to an invite, a favour, to yourself, to an opportunity, etc.

If so, congratulations! You are more than likely making the most of every opportunity and living life to the fullest. As long as you know when it is in your best interest and are able to say ‘no’ if the need arises, you are no doubt reaping the rewards and benefits of seizing the moment.

Some people without even realising have a default response of saying ‘no’. If you are one of these people, it may have been this way ever since you can remember or maybe it snuck up on you over a period of time. Whichever it is for you, now that you are aware you are doing it, you can choose to do something about it.

So why would you start saying ‘yes’ more? For starters, saying ‘yes’ gives you more opportunities. Opportunities for meeting new people, making new friends and connections, learning something new, having more experiences and enjoying life more.

I find one technique that is useful in saying ‘yes’ is instead of looking for all the reasons why you can’t do it or don’t want to do it, is to look at all the greatness in whatever the opportunity is. For example if I was asked to speak in front of a group on a subject I knew little about, instead of saying ‘no’ I look at what the opportunity would give me. Some things can be measured like the enjoyment it will bring, making new friendships, new connections and being in a position to share valuable information which may change someone’s life; and others not so measurable like confidence, self-esteem, a sense of contribution, pride, etc.

Early in my coaching journey one of the things I remember being told was to ‘say yes and work out how later.’ This technique helped me to take on my very first client and it still helps me today if I am not sure about something. You see if we never did anything until we had all of our ducks in a row, we would not achieve much at all.

After all, if we say ‘no’ the opportunity is gone. If we say ‘yes’ we have the opportunity to reap the benefits. The rest can all be worked out later. Research, practice, and the final details can all be taken care of later.

If you want to be one of those people who say ‘yes’ and reap the rewards, the first step is to consciously start saying ‘yes’ instead of ‘no.’ Saying ‘yes’ will eventually become a habit and you won’t have to think about it at all.

You will be amazed by how much your life will change simply by saying ‘yes’ more.

Definition

Yes

Used to express acknowledge-ment, affirmation, consent, agreement, or approval or to answer when one is addressed.

Something to Ponder

We say ‘no’ because we want to wait for the right moment. While patience is a virtue and having a strategy in place before you leap into something crucial is not a bad thing, you have to admit that sometimes you’re waiting for all the wrong reasons. One of the reasons might be that you’re waiting for courage or waiting to take the plunge.

We’re not always prepared for the waves of life that come our way, but we can certainly learn to ride them.

Quote of the Month

“Say yes more often because you deserve it. You deserve the vacation, the night out, that gift from a loved one and even that promotion. When life offers you the best of what it has (and it has a lot of that), allow yourself to say yes to it.

You may find yourself in a city you don’t like, in a job you have no passion for or sitting between a rock and a hard place only because you thought it would be easier to just settle for it. Settling for less than what you deserve means depriving yourself of true happiness.”
~ Unknown Author ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I easily say yes.’

Empower Newsletter – March 2015

Welcome to the March 2015 edition of the Empower Newsletter.  This month the focus is on how important living a well-balanced life is and how you can achieve it.

Do you know?

‘how to achieve balance’

Have you ever focused on something you want to achieve, you make progress, but along the way you lose focus in another area of your life? It may be a strong focus in your career when you neglect your health and/or your social life; it could be a new relationship where you forget your friends or lose track of the drive in your career; or your finances may be suffering because you’d rather go shopping and/or be social.

One of the most important aspects of life is balance. When your main focus comes apart at the seams for even one day, it may leave you feeling like your whole life is in turmoil. It is emphasised tenfold because there is nothing else going on in your life.

I believe having balance in all areas of our life is a good place to start in our quest to be happier and to feeling more content. Having balance is emphasised even more when one area isn’t going as well as you would like there are plenty more areas that are.

Another reason our focus could be in one area over another may be so we don’t have to think about the other area. This is because we tend to avoid the parts of our life that seem more painful to get them how we want them. Like starting a healthy eating regime! The thought of not being able to eat what we want, having to think about what to cook, doing up a shopping list, going shopping, and then actually preparing the meal could create a whole lot of pain.

So instead of letting the pain associated with not getting a certain area of your life in balance, associate pain to not getting it.

In other words, let us control pain and pleasure instead of it controlling us.

An effective way to associate pain to not getting what you want is to think about what will be happening in your life after 1 year if nothing changes. Think about what you will be doing, feeling, thinking, seeing, hearing and also things you will not be doing. Now take yourself 3, 5 and 10 years into the future and ask yourself the same questions. Continue asking yourself these questions until you have created enough pain around not doing it.

Once you have created enough pain around not having what you want, it will drive you toward it. After all, ‘we do more to avoid pain that we will do to feel pleasure’.

Here’s to gathering enough pain to propel you toward a more balanced life!

Definition

Well-balanced

1. Evenly balanced, pro-portioned, or regulated: a well-balanced diet.
2. Mentally or emotionally stable; well-adjusted.
3. Engaging in varied activities or having varied interests.

Something to Ponder

“Looking back at the times where I allowed my work to create stress and frustration in my life I now realize what I thought was important really was not. I am not saying you should not take your work seriously, what I am saying is that we need to realize that life is all about balance.”

~ Catherine Pulsifer ~

Quotes of the Month

“In all aspects of our lives balance is key. Doing one thing too much can cause upset, like the old saying goes, everything in moderation is the secret!”

~ Catherine Pulsifer ~

“Live a balanced life – learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.”

~ Robert Fulgham ~

Affirmation Corner

‘Every area of my life is in perfect balance.’

Empower Newsletter – February 2015

Welcome to the February 2015 edition of the Empower Newsletter. This month the focus is on our beliefs and how some of them can be making us or breaking us.

Do you know?

‘your beliefs can hold you back’

Is there something in your life that isn’t exactly the way you want it? If the answer is yes, chances are you have a limiting belief.

How do we get our beliefs anyway? Did you sit down and decide what beliefs and values you will have and why? I know I didn’t. Chances are they just turned up due to life experiences, circumstances and surroundings. Beliefs are formed in our childhood and influenced by the significant people around us such as parents, family members, teachers, peer groups, media and religion.

I wonder if you would choose some of the same beliefs if you did sit down to establish them today. I wonder how it would change your life moving forward if all of your beliefs actually served you.

As we gather our beliefs we also gather evidence to support them. That way, whenever we need to defend our position on a particular issue, we already have the evidence to come up with the proof we need.

But, in reality, there is very little in life that is absolutely right or wrong. Mostly we just adopt a belief and then stick to it unless we make a conscious decision to change it. And we interpret life and the events around us in the light of our beliefs. For example, look at the way we view other people. I believe that people are basically decent and, given a chance, will do you a good turn. Others may believe that people are selfish, only out for themselves and, given a chance, will rip you off. Which is true? Simply the one you decide is true.

The person that believes that people are only out for themselves can support their view with plenty of examples. The evidence I look for and accumulate supports my belief that people are basically good and are happy to help you if they can. Which of us is right? Both views can put forward very strong cases for their positions. The former will unconsciously be looking for the evidence they need every time they read a newspaper, watch television or have a conversation. I am doing the same thing. This is because we get what we expect and look for in life.

You may not have consciously chosen any of the beliefs you now hold. In fact, you probably took most of them on board before you were old enough to understand the concept. But the truth is that you can choose to change any of them or add to them right now and from here on.

Most people never question their beliefs because they are set in stone. Because all our thoughts, our behaviour and our actions are a direct result of our beliefs, they can inspire or destroy us.

Definition

Beliefs

Beliefs are not meant as religious beliefs but beliefs that individuals hold about themselves and their world. In the dictionary they are defined as “a principal accepted as true or real without proof. An opinion or conviction.”

Something to Ponder

“If you were able to rewind your life and watch it in slow motion from its very beginning, you would be able to see the key times when certain beliefs were formed and you would understand why you developed those beliefs.”

“The realization that what we’ve been living and telling ourselves all these years was based on a skewed perception of something that happened as a child, is a freeing moment.”

Quotes of the Month

“The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to reflect their inner beliefs.”
~ James Allen ~

“Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives.”
~ Tony Robbins ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I now change the way I look at things so the things I look at change.’

Empower Newsletter – January 2015

Happy New Year and welcome to 2015. Since it is traditionally a time for many to create a New Year’s resolution this edition of the Empower Newsletter is devoted to helping you realise any you may have set for yourself this year.

Do you know?

‘why you are setting your resolution’

Setting a New Year’s resolution or two is such a fun thing to do! But did you know that many do not achieve what they set out to do.

To help make yours a reality this year, the biggest tip I can give you is to know exactly ‘why’ you have set your resolution and also to keep this reason a constant. This will continue to motivate you to achieve it.

One of the biggest New Year’s resolutions people make is to lose weight. So if this is yours, an example of knowing your ‘why’ may be that you want to feel better about yourself.

The next step is to ask yourself these four questions which will help to create a stronger ‘why’.

1. What will happen if you get it?
2. What will happen if you don’t get it?
3. What won’t happen if you get it?
4. What won’t happen if you don’t get it?

So if I set weight loss as a resolution for myself, my ‘why’ if I did get it may include things like feeling really good about myself, being more comfortable in social situations, wearing what I want, being able to participate more because I will be fitter and being in a better mood more often.

My answer to the next question of what won’t happen if I get it may be that nothing will change, that I won’t get to feel good about myself or even sexy, I won’t be going out much and when I do I won’t feel comfortable and I won’t feel healthy.

Question three is often great motivation in accomplishing goals as ‘more people do more to avoid pain than they will do to feel pleasure’. So moving away from what you don’t want may be what motivates you more.

You will probably have to ask yourself the last question a few times before it makes sense as it is not a question we commonly ask. If I don’t realise my resolution I wouldn’t get to feel really good about myself, I won’t be healthy, I won’t be living my life to the fullest and I won’t be happy as often.

Once you have answered these four questions the next step is to work out ‘how you are going to get it’. Set out small steps like researching an eating plan, contacting a specialist, creating a shopping list, start an exercise regime.

Then start. Here’s to you!

Definition

New Year’s Resolution

A promise that you make to yourself to start doing something good or stop doing something bad on the first day of the year.

Something to Ponder

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re doing something.” — Neil Gaiman

Muhammad Ali hated every minute of training, but he said to himself “don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of my life a champion.”

Quote of the Month

“Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal.”

~ Hannah More ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I am brilliant and beautiful and a best friend to everyone who knows me. I am peaceful and happy and more successful than ever before. I am relaxed and confident and trading in my old fears on new hopes.
2015 is going to be a wonderful year for me; a year of breakthrough, options, and opportunities for new paths to follow. I am excited and ready for the challenges and the triumphs that lie ahead.’

Empower Newsletter – December 2014

Welcome to the December 2014 edition of the Empower Newsletter.  This month the focus is on letting go of old stuff that no longer serves us to allow space for the new!

Did you know?

‘letting go is like letting happiness in?’

Is there something you are holding onto in your life that is no longer serving you that may be taking up valuable head space or cluttering up an area in your home or car?

It may seem like it is a nothing thing to clear it out but when we let go of the old, it creates space for the new to come in.   It’s like that saying ‘out with the old and in with the new!’

Whether it is a thought, thing, person or an idea it all works along the same principle.

Think about it, if your life or head is already full, how can you fit more into it?

Because we are so focused on what we already have or our thoughts, we don’t look for or even notice the new opportunities that are all around us every day. We are so caught up with the old that there is no room for what we want to come in to our lives.

It’s a bit like holding a torch in one spot. You can only see what is in the area where the light is shining. There is so much more that you are not seeing or doing when the light stays focused in the one spot. Once the torch is moved you start to see things you didn’t know were there or you previously didn’t see or even notice.

If you are looking for a new relationship, it could be hanging onto the pain of a past relationship that is taking up valuable space. It could be that something needs to be released or finalised in order to create the space.

It could be finalising a resignation from work/group, getting around to formalising a long overdue divorce, or even just physically clearing out a space or wardrobe. It could be a matter of releasing someone from your thoughts and/or life or forgiving someone or something, possibly even yourself.

Writing a letter, even if it is not posted has the same effect and it also creates intention.

Do you have the space in your life or in your thoughts to allow what you want to come in?

If the old no longer serves, supports or nurtures you, letting it go will create the space for the new to come in. Once you have created the space, it will then allow you to feel more energised, empowered, fresher and most of all clearer.

It’s amazing how quickly it happens once you have moved on. Sometimes the minute you forgive, finalise or formalise something, the new seems to magically appear.

Definition

Letting go

To stop thinking about or being angry about the past or something that happened in the past.

Something to Ponder

We attach to feelings as if they define us, and ironically, not just positive ones. If you’ve wallowed in regret or disappointment for years, it can seem safe and even comforting to suffer.
In trying to hold on to what’s familiar, we limit our ability to experience joy in the present. A moment can’t possibly radiate fully when you’re suffocating it in fear.
When you stop trying to grasp, own, and control the world around you, you give it the freedom to fulfill you without the power to destroy you. That’s why letting go is so important: letting go is letting happiness in.

Quote of the Month

“Letting go is the end of something you know and the beginning of something else that you don’t know. Something new that holds opportunities.”

~ Kholoud Yasser ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I hold on to the positive memories from past relationships and let go of the dark memories with love.’

and

‘I bless you with love and release you from my life.’

Empower Newsletter – November 2014

Welcome to the November 2014 edition of the Empower Newsletter. This month the focus is on being able to move forward quicker and easier.

Do you know?

‘where you are looking?’

It was whilst I was riding my bike on a bumpy dirt road that I realised I was seeing the pot holes, rocks and other hazards I wanted to avoid but then automatically changing my glance to look where I wanted to go. This got me thinking that we do this in life to get where we want to go without even thinking about it.

If I stayed focused on the pot holes, etc. that’s where I would have ended up!

In my motor bike pre-learner course, I remember it was one of the tips given. The instructor said ‘your handlebars will follow where you are looking, so look where you want to go not where you don’t want to go.’ It’s the same in relation to driving. If you are going to crash, don’t look at the tree look back at the road. Even in my Yoga class today whilst we were attempting to balance on one leg in one of those unnatural positions, the instructor said ‘don’t look down because that is where you will end up, look up where you want to be’. By moving my glance from the floor I was able to balance a lot easier, at least for a while anyway!

This lead me to think about how many situations in our lives where we only see and look at what we don’t want and how many areas of our lives could be improved by focusing on what we do want and where we want to be!

If there is an area in your life where you are not getting the results you want it could be because you are focusing on what you don’t want rather than what you do want. For example, if you don’t want a partner with a certain habit you may be seeing that habit in everyone. After all, what you focus on is what you get! If we change our behaviour and actually look for the qualities we do want in a partner, that would then become our focus and we will automatically move in that direction. By knowing what you do want not only gives you awareness but also creates the intention.

It will work in every area of your life. For example, if you want to be treated a certain way then start looking for and focusing on that behaviour. If you want to be happy, start looking at being happy. This way your focus will be on finding environments, things and people that will make you happy.

Knowing what you don’t want is great but unless you know what you do want, how do you and your unconscious know what you are truly looking for or even when you find it? If we are so focused on not getting what we don’t want then that is all that we will see!

So to move forward quicker and easier look where you want to go by seeing what you don’t want but looking at what you do want!

Definition

Forward

Forward, indicates a direction toward the front or a movement in a frontward direction. Forward applies to any movement toward what is or is conceived to be the front or a goal.

Something to Ponder

Always look where you want to go because if you don’t look where you want to go you will go where you are looking at.

Quotes of the Month

“From all that I have seen, time and time again, at least 90% of success derives from having a dream and knowing what you want.” ~ Billy Cox ~ Life.

It comes down to knowing what you want, and really going after it. ~ Unknown ~

“If you know what you want, if you’ve made up your mind, if you can see it, feel it and move toward it in some way every single day….. it has to happen.” ~ Mike Dooley ~

Affirmation Corner

I am on top of the world and I am going for it. I have a clear picture in my mind of what I want. I can see it in front of me, I know what I want and I know how to get it.

Empower Newsletter – October 2014

Welcome to the October 2014 edition of the Empower Newsletter. This month the focus is on the importance of articulating ‘how you will know when you get what you want.’

Do you know?

‘what will be happening when you get it!’

In the October 2011 Newsletter I wrote about how important it is to know what you do want, as opposed to knowing what you don’t want. Put simply, this is because what you focus on is what you get! So instead of focusing on not being unhappy focus on being happy or instead of focusing on not being fat focus on being healthy, exercising and eating healthy.

Once clients have articulated what they do want the next step is to be aware of what will be happening when they actually get it.

This may sound weird but it is not uncommon to have never given it a second thought. It can be quite challenging to articulate what it will feel like, or what will be different when it happens. This is because we may not have thought about it or experienced it before. How do you know what you don’t know?

We tend to gravitate toward the familiar and unless we actually know what will be happening when we get what we want we continue to make the same choices and do the same things we have always done. Those very actions, or non-actions, that have given us the results we have achieved in the past. And we all know ‘if nothing changes, nothing changes.’

By knowing what will be happening when we get it enables us to see that we have choices along the way instead of blindly choosing the familiar.

Some common examples include wanting to be happy, feeling worthy, having confidence or wanting to belong.

Some questions to ask yourself include: – What will be different when I am happy, worthy, confident or when I belong? What will I be doing and thinking? What sort of activities will I be involved in? What kind of people will I be associating with? What sort of conversations will I be having? How will I be feeling when I get it? And how will I know it’s time to feel it?

If you are having trouble answering some of these questions a great method is to think of someone you do know or know of, that already has the results in the area you want and then ask yourself what they would do, think, feel or act in that situation.

After answering these questions you will start to notice different things you haven’t noticed before. Your awareness will expand, your choices will increase and you will start realising your desires before you know it.

Definition

Articulate

1. using language easily and fluently; having facility with words.

2. expressed, formulated, or presented with clarity and effectiveness.

Something to Ponder

Being able to articulate to your mind as clearly and concisely as possible activates a portion of your brain called the Reticular Activating System, or RAS for short. The RAS is the part of your brain that is responsible for attention among other things. By clearly articulating to your RAS what is important to you, it will look for ways, both consciously and unconsciously, to make that your reality.

Enlisting the RAS in the pursuit of your goals really increases your chance of successful attainment.

Quote of the Month

“Suspecting and knowing are not the same.”

~ Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief ~

Affirmation Corner

I easily articulate what will be happening in my life when I get what I want.

Empower Newsletter – September 2014

Welcome to the September 2014 edition of the Empower Newsletter and the beginning of Spring. As Spring signifies new growth and renewal I thought it would be nice to focus on restarting and redoing.

Do you know?

‘the past does not equal the future!’

How often have you decided not to start something simply because it didn’t work out in the past?

It is surprisingly very common! A lot of the time we don’t realise we are even doing it! The reason for this is that we are often on auto-pilot and our unconscious takes over. It remembers everything and it just wants to look after us. When we have had a bad experience in the past it reminds us how it turned out last time. And we wouldn’t want to go through that pain again, so we avoid it!

Some common examples of things you may have started that ended badly include a course that you didn’t complete, a relationship that didn’t work out, an arthroscopy that left you wondering if it was worthwhile or an attempt to learn a musical instrument.

Are you defined by the pain of your past? I wonder what will happen if you continue to let this pain hold you back. The answer is ‘nothing’. That’s right nothing will change! Life will continue as you know it today. It’s time to move away from the pain of the past and toward the joy and contentment of your future!

And the good news is, no matter what you’ve done in the past – whatever mistakes you’ve made, whatever knowledge you didn’t yet have, whatever limitations you allowed to hold you back – it doesn’t mean you are doomed to live that way always.

I hear some of you saying, ‘what’s the point in doing it again it didn’t work out last time?’ Well what would happen if you did do it again and the outcome was different and/or more successful this time? How would that change your life? Would it give you more enjoyment and make you feel more content and good about yourself!

By changing one little thing will change the outcome. It could be a thought, a belief, a feeling, an expectation of failure, an action or even a non-action.

How can we expect to succeed if our expectation is that we will fail? What do you need to think about yourself in order to expect success?

Choosing to change the meaning, to reframe the situation is another useful way of creating a different outcome.

What will you begin or restart?

Your future is for you to create!

Definition

Future

Something that will exist or happen in time to come.

In other words, something that hasn’t happened yet!

Something to Ponder

If you want to succeed in your life, remember this phrase: The Past does not equal The Future. Because you failed yesterday; or all day today; or a moment ago; or for the last six months; the last 16 years; or the last fifty years of life, doesn’t mean anything…All that matters is: What are you going to do, RIGHT NOW!!?” –

~ Anthony Robbins ~

Quote of the Month

“See the things that you want as already yours. Know that they will come to you at need. Then let them come. Don’t fret and worry about them. Don’t think about your lack of them. Think of them as yours, as belonging to you, as already in your possession.”

~ Robert Collier ~

Affirmation Corner

I can accomplish anything that I put my mind to here in the present moment. My past has no bearing on what I can and will create. If it has never happened before, that is all the more reason for me to make it happen now. I will cease being a slave to my past.

Empower Newsletter – August 2014

Welcome to the August 2014 edition of the Empower Newsletter. This month the focus is on what motivates us to change.

Do you know?

‘what motivates you!’

Are you motivated to go after what you want when not having it becomes too painful or is it the thought of actually getting it that drives you? That is, is your trigger to change something in your life by moving away from pain or to move toward pleasure?

Neither way is right or wrong, good or bad, it is just a matter of what we do as individuals.

By becoming more aware of what motivates us to take action helps us to get where we want to be a lot quicker.

When I first heard this theory, I thought for sure I did things because I was driven toward the outcome, but that wasn’t the case! For example, the reason I make decisions about what I eat and don’t eat is because I associate putting on weight as being painful. Hence putting on weight is more painful to me than not having the food. If I was motivated by staying healthy and looking good it would be a different story.

Believe it or not, most people make a change to move away from pain rather than being driven to feel the pleasure of getting what they want.

To work out if you move away from pain or toward pleasure, think about something in the past when you have made a big change. Was it to get away from a bad situation or pain, or was it to get what you wanted?

Most people go on a diet because being the size they are causes them some degree of discomfort and pain. The trigger may be realising that the size they thought they were has suddenly become too small, or it may be seeing an unflattering photo of themselves, health concerns, or even an innocent comment from their partner about putting on weight. Whatever the trigger, all of these examples are driven to avoid the pain! If we were motivated to be healthy or to look a certain way then we would be driven by pleasure.

Other common scenarios are decisions based on leaving your partner, job or changing careers. Does your motivation come because you are experiencing pain? It could be that you have started to hate your job, your boss, or your partner. Maybe you aren’t getting paid enough money or you aren’t getting on with your partner. Or does your motivation come from wanting to feel the pleasure of working in a job or career that you have a passion for and would really love or being with your ideal partner?

Does your motivation come from moving away from pain or moving forward to feel pleasure?

Definition

Motivation

Motivation is defined as the process that initiates, guides, and maintains goal-oriented behaviours. Motivation is what causes us to act, whether it is getting a glass of water to reduce thirst or reading a book to gain knowledge.

Something to Ponder

By continually creating more pain around an undesired behaviour, that is going to stop you getting what you ultimately want, will propel you to get what you want.

So why not use pain and pleasure to control your decisions, don’t let pain and pleasure control you!

Quote of the Month

“Get going. Move forward. Aim high. Plan a takeoff. Don’t just sit on the runway and hope someone will come along and push the airplane. It simply won’t happen. Change your attitude and gain some altitude. Believe me, you’ll love it up here.”

~ Donald Trump ~

Affirmation Corner

‘Motivation comes easily to me.’

and

‘My life is full of purpose and motivation.’

Empower Newsletter – July 2014

Welcome to the July 2014 edition of the Empower Newsletter. This month the focus is on enjoying taking time out to relax.

Do you know?

‘how to enjoy relaxing!’

Are you someone who has trouble sitting, relaxing or doing nothing at all? Do you think to yourself that you will be able to sit when everything is done? “But there always seems to be something that needs to be done!” Does the little voice in your head say “I can relax when it is all done?” And that time never seems to come!

Will you be able to sit when everything is done?

This thinking serves some of us.   It may even be the driving force in making us get things done. For others, the effects may not be so positive to constantly have to be doing something. In fact it may be taking a toll on our health, relationships and/or peace of mind. Imagine what effect being busy all the time has on our loved ones and the toll it takes on our body and mind.

Maybe when you have sat and done nothing in the past, you have not allowed your mind to switch off if there are things that need doing. It may help overcome this habit if you have a plan. In other words, if you had a scheduled time of exactly when you will do it, it would then allow you to relax until that time arrives.

Another way to become okay with doing nothing is to change a belief you may have that is not allowing you to take time out. For example, a belief that relaxing or doing nothing might mean you are not productive and therefore lazy. And if you think you are lazy it may make you feel unworthy. And nobody wants to feel unworthy! By changing this belief to something more positive, it will allow you to sit and stop pushing yourself so much to be busy in order to feel worthy.

By changing what you think about yourself for not being active is a technique that often works. After all who controls your mind?

If you are worried about what others may think of you, remember you are the only person you have to please. If you can live with the consequences of what you choose to do or not do, that is all that matters.

After all if you are enjoying what you are doing, even if it is nothing, how can it be wrong or a waste of time?

Will you choose to be constantly busy or change a belief, thought or process that will allow you to recharge your batteries and get it done in your own time with peace of mind?

Definition

Relaxation

1. Abatement or relief from bodily or mental work, effort, application, etc.

2. An activity or recreation that provides such relief; diversion; entertainment.

3. A loosening or slackening.

Something to Ponder

Health benefits of taking time out to relax include: -

Destressing
Clearer mind
Increased energy
Feeling more awake and alive
Refreshed
Happier
Improved mood

Quotes of the Month

“It’s a good idea always to do something relaxing prior to making an important decision in your life.”

~ Paulo Coelho ~

“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.”

~ Jim Goodwin & Sydney J. Harris ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I often take time and relax and enjoy life.’

‘My thoughts are under my control.’