Empower Newsletter – August 2013

Welcome to the August edition of the Empower Newsletter.  This month the theme is about moving forward.

Did you know?

‘feeling stuck is quite common!’

Has there ever been a time in your life when you felt stuck and didn’t know how to pull yourself out of it?

Well if you answered yes, you are not alone. It’s actually quite common to feel stuck! And what makes it worse is that it is a bit like quick sand, the more you attempt and struggle to pull yourself out, the deeper you seem to sink!

The reason for this is because ‘what we focus on is what we get’. So by focusing on the ‘problem’ we get more of the ‘problem’. So the trick is to focus on the solution, ‘how you would like it to be’ and then putting in the action to make it happen.

Some other reasons why we feel stuck include: -

The need for a much bigger game to play.
If what we want is too small, some of us simply aren’t motivated enough to fire on all cylinders.
The need for a smaller game to play.
If want we want is too large, some of us get overwhelmed
The need to start doing the opposite of what we’ve been doing.
Just ask yourself what would happen, or what you would feel if you started doing the opposite of what you’ve been doing to get what you want.
We don’t really want what we say we want.
What we want is more of what we “should” want vs. what we “actually” want so we don’t get very far with it.
The need to work out what we want.
Being able to clearly, simply, and cleanly articulate what we most want.
We may be concerned about perceived loss or consequences.
Even if everything is going to be terrific when we get what we want, the fear of losing someone’s love, old friends, routine, etc., can be more than enough to keep us stuck in the present.
Our environments are not properly set up to support what we want.
Environments include family, friends, networks, emotional environments, creative stimulation, performance support (like a coach), what we eat (for the energy we need) and how clean our energy is.
We may be just plain scared.
Sometimes, want we want is so exciting that it becomes overwhelming and we get entangled in the process.
Want we want is not a clear enough expression of our true values.
What we want must be aligned with our internal values.

Becoming aware of what is keeping us stuck allows us to change what needs to be changed to ultimately get what we want.

Events Schedule

Chicks in the City
Wed 21/08/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 21st August 2013.

Chicks in the City meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect. Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

Something to Ponder

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

~ Steve Maraboli ~

Quote of the Month

“Because my life isn’t going to wait around while I figure out how to make it work.”

~ Susane Colasanti ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I choose to change because I choose to be better!’
and/or
‘I created my status quo and only I can change it!’

Empower Newsletter – July 2013

Welcome to the July edition of the Empower Newsletter. It’s the middle of winter and what better time to snuggle up and reflect on where we are now, what we have achieved and what we want to achieve in our lives. Are you where you want to be?

Did you know?

‘your mojo is always with you!’

Do you sometimes think you have lost your mojo and wonder if you will ever find it again?

What is ‘your mojo’ anyway! The dictionary definition describes it as a charm or spell, but it’s more commonly used to describe a talent, a good luck charm, sex appeal or the way you present yourself. In actual fact it means different things for each of us. For some of us it is about feeling great about ourselves or believing we are good at something, and for others it’s about having self-confidence or self-assuredness.

Whatever your mojo means to you, it is never too far away. Even if you think you have never really found your mojo, it is there for you to take. You see our mojo is a belief we have about ourselves and unfortunately somewhere along the line we have decided, usually unconsciously, to let it go or not believe in it at all.

Whether something changed in your life, someone said something that made you question yourself or you believe you never really had it at all, it doesn’t matter. We all have our own mojo and it is within each of us all the time. We are the ones that denied it or allowed it be become lost or buried!

Love is a great way to find your mojo. It has the power to make you feel sexy, appealing and invincible. When I say ‘love’, I mean love of self. By loving yourself, you are not going to let what others think, how you look or what you are doing in your life affect how you feel and act!

Imagine if someone you loved, perhaps your child, parents, partner or a friend, allowed a situation or what others thought of them dictate how they felt. What advice would you give them? Would you want them to question themselves and allow their mojo to be lost, or would you want them to be self-confident and self-assured and continue to feel their mojo! I am sure you would want the best for them. So how about wanting the same for yourself! After all, if you are functioning at your best, you are more able to be all you can for others.

Another way to find your mojo is to ‘act as if’ you have it. In other words, if you did have it how would you be acting? If you continue to ‘act as if’ you already had it, before you know it you will have it. This principle works on the theory that you are creating a habit. It will work for anything! All you have to do is do it long enough and eventually it will become the norm.

Events Schedule

Chicks in the City
Wed 17/07/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 17th July 2013.

Chicks in the City meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect. Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

Something to Ponder

“Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.”
~ Lao Tzu ~

Quote of the Month

“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”
~ Theodore Roosevelt ~

Affirmation Corner

‘I approve of myself and love myself deeply and completely.’

Written by Di Browne, Coach to Empower

Empower Newsletter – June 2013

‘satisfaction comes from within!’

Have you ever wondered why a person who seems to have everything is unsatisfied, yet another who doesn’t have much seems to be so completely satisfied.  It doesn’t even seem to matter how many possessions, family and/or friends they have around them either.  People are either satisfied or they are not!

The feeling of satisfaction actually comes from within, just as the feeling of not achieving and being unsatisfied comes from within!  For that matter, all of our feelings are generated by, you guessed it, us!  We control how we perceive everything.

So what does it take to feel satisfied?  Well for me it’s about being in the moment, which means not thinking about something else and not wishing I was doing something else.  It’s about finding the joy in what I am doing and allowing myself to enjoy it.

To feel satisfied it doesn’t have to be something we consider a huge achievement, etc.  It can be as simple as living your life with people you enjoy, spending time alone, playing with your ipad or computer, or playing a sport on the weekends.  You could even feel satisfied that you got up early this morning.

It all starts with knowing what makes you feel satisfied.  For example, how do you know when you feel satisfied?  Below are a few questions to help you discover what it takes for you to feel satisfied –

*What is satisfaction?  *How do you know when you feel it?  *What has to happen for you to feel it?  *How often does it have to happen?  *What feeling do you get?

Now that you have a better understanding of what it takes for you to feel satisfied, it is now time to decide if your answers are serving you.  If you do not feel satisfied very often or if it takes a lot for you to feel satisfied, maybe your expectations are too high.  By changing what has to happen for you to feel satisfied and making it more attainable, it makes sense that you will feel satisfied more often.

For example, if you believe that to feel satisfied you have to have everything cleared off your desk, all of your chores done, win every game, get the promotion, own your own home or be in an intimate relationship, you probably won’t be feeling satisfied very often.

By changing your rules for feeling satisfied, it will allow you to feel it more often!

Imagine how feeling satisfied more often would enhance your life, how it would translate to the people you love and how it would benefit your life in general.

Chicks in the City

Wed 19/06/2013 at 6.30pm

 The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 19^th June 2013.

Chicks in the City meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

“You say, ‘If I had a little more, I should be very satisfied.’  You make a mistake.  If you are not content with what you have, you would not be satisfied if it were doubled.”

~ Charles H. Spurgeon ~

“If I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own backyard.  Because if it isn’t there, I never really lost it to begin with.”

~ L. Frank Baum, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz ~

‘I am satisfied with everything I am and everything I have.’

Written by Di Browne, Coach to Empower

Empower Newsletter – May 2013

‘listening generates respect!’

I find it really fascinating that we sometimes feel the need to argue our view to the point that it is detrimental to relationships.

There are many different reasons why we feel the need to express our opinions and beliefs.  It could be as simple as just trying to get the other person to understand; it could be a habit, always defending our position; it could be a belief that if they are right, then we must be wrong; and/or it could also give us the illusion that we have won.

It doesn’t mean that we are right or wrong just because we have a different view to someone else.  It also doesn’t mean that we have won just because we have argued our position.  We can all justify (and we do), how we are right and they are wrong!  Have you ever stopped and wondered what you are doing when you argue a point with someone?  You are actually telling them that they are wrong and their opinion is wrong.  You are backing them into a corner, and when we are backed into a corner we feel the need to defend ourselves.

What would happen if we occasionally didn’t feel the need to argue our point, especially with a loved one?  Would it mean we are weak and wrong?  No, it’s totally the opposite.  Not having to defend our position shows a great sense of self-worth for ourselves and respect for the other person.  You see when we try to convince someone why we are right (and they are not) we are actually shooting them down and in turn making them feel lesser then or not good enough, and I am sure the intention is not to alienate them or to make them feel bad.

The best way for everyone to ultimately get what they want is to seek out the other person’s point of view by listening.  If you don’t listen, chances are he or she won’t.  Let them have their say without you defending your position.  Ask them “Why do you think that’s true.”  Not with a hidden agenda, to defend your position, or to correct them, but to let them have the satisfaction of being right.  You never know, you may even learn something new or expand your view.  By seeking first to understand, you are putting your love and respect for the person to whom you are speaking above your need to be right.   Afterward they may even be open to listen to your view.

Arguing alienates, listening generates respect!  Give it a go; I would love to hear what happens.

‘Listening is the key to understanding.’

Chicks in the City

Wed 8/05/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 8th May 2013.

Chicks in the City usually meet the third Wednesday of the month (second Wednesday this month) from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

“Effective listeners remember that “words have no meaning – people have meaning.” And although our experiences, knowledge and attitudes differ, we often misinterpret each other’s messages while under the illusion that a common understanding has been achieved.”

~ Larry Barker ~

“One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know at least somebody’s listening.”

~ Franklin P. Jones ~

Written by Di Browne, Coach to Empower

Empower Newsletter – April 2013

‘less is more!’

Over the last month I have heard several times that less is more!  The judges from the reality TV show The Block continually told contestants that when it comes to decorating, ‘less is more!’  Apparently the trick to making a garden look striking is to keep the design simple.  When out shopping for clothes and accessories recently I was told that when it comes to fashion, ‘less is more!’

It got me thinking that ‘if less is more’ in all of these other areas, the same must be true for life itself.  I wonder what would happen if we didn’t overcomplicate our everyday lives, if we put more effort into what is really important to us!  Would we end up with more?  More of what is important to us!  What if we decided to focus on the things that are important to us and less on the things that are not?  Would the quality of our lives in the areas we were focusing improve because we were concentrating on them!  My guess is that it would, how can it not when

‘what you focus on is what you get!’

The first step is establishing what is important to you.  Some of you will know, and others will have to think about it a bit more.  Some quality questions to ask yourself include: -

1. What am I doing when I am at my happiest, most fulfilled or most content?
2. How do I know this is important to me?
3. How does it make me feel?

There will probably be a number of things that are important to you.  If this is the case prioritise them by numbering them in order of importance.

The next step is to start focusing more on the areas that reached the top of your list and less on other less important things in your life.

I found it interesting that the meaning of ‘less is more’ is “The notion that simplicity and clarity lead to good design.”  So does that mean by simplifying what we focus on and gaining clarity around what is really important to us, we create a good life?

Sounds pretty simple doesn’t it!  What have you got to lose by giving it a go?

‘It is what it is!’

Chicks in the City

Wed 17/04/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 17 April 2013.

Chicks in the City meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

When a composer overcomplicates things, we hear it. When an architect or model overcomplicates things, we see it. When a chef overcomplicates things, we taste it.

Life is not so simple.  The thing is we don’t necessarily get immediate feedback when we overcomplicate our lives and we may not know what we are doing until the damage is done.

“Less is more and usually more effective.”

~ Steve Jobs ~

Written by Di Browne, Coach to Empower

Empower Newsletter – March 2013

‘keeping a compliment to ourselves is often about self-judgement’

Have you ever noticed how nice someone looked or admired something they were wearing, their hair, their smile or an aspect of their personality and kept it to yourself?  I know I have!

Many years ago I noticed that a friend of mine used to compliment people a lot.  It wasn’t over the top or anything like that, it was just very noticeable that she said what she thought.  One day it came up in conversation and I will never forget what she said because it made so much sense to me.  So much so, that I decided to make it a habit of mine to start saying out load what I had previously thought and kept to myself (compliments that is).

She said, “we often think it or tell someone else instead of saying it directly to the actual person the compliment is about.  What’s the point of telling others or keeping it to yourself, I want the person the compliment is about to know.  It makes them feel good.”

It got me wondering why we don’t give more compliments more freely to others.  One reason is that we add ourselves to the equation!  Instead of giving a compliment and allowing the person to feel good, we unconsciously judge ourselves against them.  If we judge ourselves against others and they look great, does that mean that we are inferior?  If we don’t say it, does that mean the person will never know we think we are less then?  We don’t want them to think they are better than us now do we, lol!

One way to overcome these feelings of being less then is to take ourselves out of the equation.  How they look or the compliment we give has nothing to do with us, it is solely about them.  Another way is to give ourselves a break and stop judging ourselves so harshly.  A great way to do this is to imagine what you would say to your child or someone else you loved if they judged themselves as harshly.  Would you want them judging themselves or would you want them to know they are perfect just the way they are?  We deserve the same courtesy from ourselves!

It costs us nothing to give a compliment and it actually feels fantastic.  A lot of the time you will make the person’s day!

 ‘I am perfect just the way I am’

Chicks in the City

Wed 20/03/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 20 March 2013.

Chicks in the City meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

When I say, “I love you,” it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you.  It has nothing to do with me.  I love what you are, what you do, how you try.  I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are. You’re a hell of a person.”

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”

~ Siddh?rtha Gautama ~

Written by Di Browne, Coach to Empower

Empower Newsletter – February 2013

‘rephrasing your sentences, will improve your results’

It was during my spin (cycle) class at the gym whilst struggling for a breath when it hit me.  I was unconsciously responding to what I was hearing from the instructor.  Usually I hear, ‘keep going, stay strong, you’re in control or you can do it,’ which are all things I want to do and think.  On this particular occasion though I heard, ‘don’t stop.’  Instantly I thought about stopping!  This is because the brain does not automatically process negatives.  Our unconscious mind hears the word ‘stop’, and in order for me not to stop, I had to think about stopping.  This instinctively raised the question in my mind of whether to stop or not. It would have been much easier if I didn’t hear the word stop in the first place.

It’s amazing how important our language is in communicating with other people.  It plays a big part in determining our results and non-results and how people react to us.  For example, if we communicate by telling people what we don’t want, they first think about what we have said.  For example, if we say to a child not to walk on the grass, they immediately think about walking on the grass.

It is the same when we are waiting to be served in a shop or waiting to see someone.  If that person said to me ‘sorry to keep you waiting’, I would think about being kept waiting.

Now don’t think about a pink elephant!  That’s right, don’t think about a pink elephant!  How did you go?  In order not to think about a pink elephant, did you first have to think about a pink elephant?

So if you want people to respond positively to what you are communicating, as opposed to first thinking about what you don’t want them to do, tell them in a positive sense stated the way you want it.

In the example above about being kept waiting, what would you first think about if the shop assistant said ‘thanks for your patience’.  That’s right you would think about how patient you were and depending on how long you had been waiting, respond accordingly.  In relation to a child not walking on the grass, instead tell them what you want them to do.  Positively stated you could say ‘please walk on the foot path.’

This is a valuable tool to make our lives easier.  We can use it in every area of our lives to get our desired reactions, responses and outcomes.  Give it a go, it really works!

‘I use language that gets me the outcome I want.’

Chicks in the City

Wed 20/03/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 20 March 2013.

Chicks in the City usually meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

When was the last time someone told you not to worry? Were you able to just stop worrying right then and there in that moment?

The more we try to force these things, the more bound up we get and the harder it is to perform freely and to our potential.

“It’s not what you tell them…it’s what they hear.”
~ Red Auerbach ~

“For me, words are a form of action, capable of influencing change.”
~ Ingrid Bengis ~

Author Di Browne, Coach to Empower

How to use PAIN to your advantage!

It’s human nature to do more to avoid pain than to gain pleasure?  That’s right, we will do more to avoid something we perceive as painful then we will do to gain pleasure from doing it.  When I first heard this principle, I thought it sounded ridiculous.  I want things in my life that give me pleasure!  That degree will give me pleasure right; it will get me the job, promotion or the pay rise I want!  It sure will, although if the perceived pain such as studying, essays, exams and time associated with the degree is greater than the pain of not getting the promotion or the pay rise, I will do more to avoid what I perceive as more painful.  In this case finishing the degree!  This principle is the same in every area of our lives.  Anything you have not done is because you perceive more pain around doing it.

Use the Pain v’s Pleasure principle to get what you want!

Doing more to avoid pain than to feel pleasure is an inbuilt survival mechanism to avoid things that we know will cause us pain.  We don’t have to think about it, we just know it will be painful.  For example, we know that when we end a relationship, it will be painful.  To a lot of people the word ‘diet’ congers up all sorts of pain, like missing out on their favourite food or having to exercise, less time to relax, etc.  These aren’t necessarily conscious thoughts; in fact it is usually the opposite.  They are just things we know will be painful based on past experiences.

So if we create more pain around not doing what we want, it makes sense that we will avoid doing what we perceive has the greatest pain.  In other words, it will propel us toward getting what we really want.  For example, if you want to be a particular size, create more pain around not being that size rather than creating pain around what is involved with losing the weight.

Before I explain how to create more pain around the old unwanted behaviour, ask yourself what the pain is you associate with doing it.  That is, the reason you haven’t done it yet.  It could be as simple as ‘the time it takes’ or ‘the loss of something’ because we see it as painful if something is taken away from us.

Is the thought of losing something painful to you?

Now you will have a new awareness around what you were associating the pain to if you were to do it!  The next step is to ask yourself what pleasure you get from not following through.  You may have got pleasure from eating or more time by not following through.  As an example, if you were on a diet you may have eaten a chocolate biscuit.  You may say that eating the chocolate biscuit doesn’t bring you pleasure, it makes you feel like crap!  What is more real in the moment though, the pain of being fat or the pleasure of eating the chocolate biscuit?

So now it’s time to create so much more pain around not getting what you want and to make you want to avoid it.  One of the most effective ways to do this is to ask yourself the following questions.

In one years’ time if nothing changes: -

what will be happening in my life?

what will be happening with my health?

what sorts of things will I be telling myself?

what will my relationships with others and more importantly, myself be like?

what will it cost me in other areas of my life?

what will I be missing out on?

what will be happening emotionally and financially?

how will I be feeling?

In two years’ time if nothing changes: -

Ask yourself the same questions again

In five years’ time if nothing changes: -

Ask yourself the same questions again

Now how are you feeling?  I have no doubt you are keen to avoid the pain you just created and are feeling very motivated to get on with doing what it is you want.  If not, keep going through the questions above until you have found enough pain to make you want to avoid it.

The trick is to continually create more pain around the undesired behaviour that is going to stop you getting what you ultimately want.  This will then propel you to get what you want.

Take control now!  Use pain and pleasure to control your decisions, don’t let pain and pleasure control you.

Copyright Di Browne - 24 January 2013

Empower Newsletter – January 2013

‘there are side effects to not taking enough time for yourself’

What does ‘time to yourself’ mean? It doesn’t mean when you are in the car driving to and from work or when you are at work.  In the context I am talking about, it’s about scheduled time doing nothing or something YOU really want to do.  It’s about not being a daughter/son, mother/father, employee, sister/brother, etc.  Whether it is taking up a hobby or an old past time like bike riding, meditating, taking a hot bath, exercising, chatting on the phone, hanging out with friends or playing video games it doesn’t matter.  As long as it is something you want to do and it is all about you!

One of the side effects when people do not take enough time for themselves is time management issues.  It sounds ironic really, not taking time for themselves is symptomatic of not being as time effective as they would like.  So what are they doing instead?

More than likely they are procrastinating and/or getting side tracked from the task at hand.  They are unconsciously craving some time out!  Craving some time for themselves to do whatever they please.  Have you ever found yourself scrolling the internet reading things that have nothing to do with the task at hand, and all of a sudden you notice an hour or two has past?  What about spending time on something that is totally unrelated to what needs to be done?  I am sure most of us have!

And this can be fine!  It only becomes an issue if you want to be getting other things done!  If getting side tracked continues and eventually stops you from achieving, and starts to affect other areas of your life, look at taking some scheduled time for yourself.  This will recharge the batteries for you to focus on getting the task at hand done. And getting things done in a more focused manner will then allow you more time to allocate to yourself.

It’s a bit of a cycle, getting side tracked to unconsciously have some time out really stops you from doing what needs to be done.  So if you do what needs to be done in the first place then you will be able to take time out to do exactly what you want to do!

Say ‘yes’ to you!

‘I have the freedom to do as I choose with my time.’

Chicks in the City

Wed 16/01/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 16 January 2013.

Chicks in the City usually meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

Don’t say you don’t have enough time.  You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.

~ H. Jackson Brown ~

If you want to make good use of your time, you’ve got to know what’s most important and then give it all you’ve got.

~ Lee lacocca ~

“Until you value yourself,

 you will not value your time.

Until you value your time,

you will not do anything with it.”

~ M. Scott ~

Copyright Di Browne, Coach to Empower

Empower Newsletter – December 2012

Welcome to the December edition of the Empower Newsletter.  During the last month I have been travelling around our beautiful country in our beautiful new caravan.  Along the way we met a lot of wonderful people who were really happy and friendly.  This got me to thinking that when people are on holidays they are usually happier and sometimes more friendly.  So the focus this month is around happiness!

‘the way you feel is a choice!’

Sitting here outside my caravan after an early morning walk and scrumptious breakfast, I find myself wondering what it is about being on holidays that seems to change demeanours.  People are smiling, talking and waving to each other.  It’s as if they do not have a care in the world.

For a lot of people once the holiday is finished its back to seeing things the way they did before the holiday.  My question is, if we are happy on holidays, what stops us from being happy all year round?  After all, we choose how we feel!

You may say it’s because when you are on holidays you can do what you want.  Not having to go to work, get the kids to school, do housework, etc.

So does this mean that because you can’t do what you want at home, you cannot be happy?  Does this mean that you can only be happy when you are on holidays?  What if you could feel happy all year round!  How would it change the quality of your life?  I imagine you would be experiencing life from a different perspective, seeing things from another angle, hearing different things, experiencing better relationships and having loads more fun.

Or perhaps you would prefer to constantly feel tired, stressed, rushed, sad, depressed or guilty!  If you are seeing the world from this perspective, I wonder what you are missing out on and how it is impacting on your relationships and your reality.

You are solely responsible for all the choices in your life.  Even not making a choice is a choice.  The way you choose to feel or see the world directly contributes to the quality of your life.

So next time you find yourself in a disempowering state, remember you have the power to change it and choose happiness.

Here is an extra tip to instantly help you to feel happy.  It’s about changing your physiology.  All you have to do is sit or stand up straight, hold your shoulders back, look up and smile.  You may even want to laugh out loud although it is not necessary.    This technique is simple and works every time.  You can even help your friends and family to instantly feel happy by sharing this technique.

‘My happiness is reflected in my smile and cheerful personality.’

Chicks in the City

Wed 16/01/2013 at 6.30pm

The next gathering for Chicks in the City will be Wednesday 16 January 2013.

Chicks in the City usually meet the third Wednesday of the month from 6.30pm to 8.00pm at Ryde Eastwood Leagues Club, 117 Ryedale Road, West Ryde in the lounge area next to the Bristo.

Chicks in the City is a group for women to connect.  Basically it’s all about hanging out with women, meeting new friends, socialising, finding like-minded women to chat to or even making long lasting friendships.

All women are welcome and it’s free.

Men spend their lives in anticipations, in determining to be vastly happy at some period when they have time.  But the present time has one advantage over every other – it is our own.  Past opportunities are gone, future have not come.  We may lay in a stock of pleasure, as we would lay in a stock of wine; but if we defer the tasting of them too long, we shall find that both are soured by age.

~ Charles Caleb Colton ~

“For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Written Di Browne